You all know I love to dance. It’s how I express myself and let everything go.
I have come to a recent realization that I’ve been doing more dancing than I thought. I have actually been doing a certain kind of dance my whole life. A dance of three parts, only I just started to learn the third.
The dance goes something like this:
Trust in myself.
I’m currently coasting somewhere between the second and third step.
In trying to find my voice as a teacher, I started to realize how often we imitate instead of create. At first I was shocked at the realization.
Then relived – relived that I now know. When I started to reflect, I began to see that I may not be the only one often consumed with what other people are doing and we don’t even know it.
Why do we care so much what others are wearing, eating, thinking, doing?
A part of me wants to think it’s because we care about them (maybe? sometimes?).
But maybe it’s because we want to make sure we are not all alone out there. Maybe it’s because we don’t want to stand out, or snowplow our own roads especially when we are uncertain where the path will lead.
When you dive into it, there is nothing wrong with following a little direction. We imitate from the day we are born – when we utter our first words, when we take our first step. Being social creatures, we are programmed to want to relate to others and experience what others are experiencing.
When I was about 6 years old, I have a strong recollection of imitating my mom. I would cross my legs just like her when I sat down. Again, just like her, I would stand in front of the mirror and “get ready for work”, sliding my tiny feet into her stilettos, borrowing her big leather purse for my important ”meeting”.
Wearing my mom’s clothes seems innocent enough, but the question still is, at what point does our own life really begin?
Of course, some people are experts at something while we are beginners, so naturally there’s so much to soak in and learn from them. For example, I look for guidance from Pilates mentors and other teachers who I find have a lot to offer. I gravitate toward instructors who I find compassionate, genuine, passionate about their work, and masterful. It’s only natural that I want to learn from them.
The question then becomes how do we reap the benefits of connecting with and learning from others without simply imitating?
Trusting yourself has a lot to do with it.
I discovered that the true value of what my mentors have to offer is so much greater than those things that you can imitate. I look to them for guidance, advice, and support. Most importantly, I don’t look to them to answer all my questions, but to guide me to my own answers.
So much joy pulses through my body as I am slowly realizing that I’m looking at my own reflection in the mirror and creating my own life. The more I find myself trusting that I have unique gifts to offer to this world, the more I have the courage to create.
How wonderful and scary at the same time!
Create your best Tuesday night I think I’m actually going to create a relaxing night for myself and watch a movie with the hubby.